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Tenth Anniversary Issue
Fall 1993   Vol. 10 #1
Fall 1993   Vol. 10 #1

Poems/Not Poems

Ode to Denial

By Alia Johnson

 
 

 

This is not happening.

 

The sandwich half-made,

the milk half-poured,

the conversation half-heard,

truth half-told,

sky half-seen.

 

Dim light allows

a contracted mind

to believe:

 

This is not happening.

 

I am a careful cook

temporarily

feeding the children

on peanut butter sandwiches.

 

I am a good listener

but the inner chatter

is loud today.

 

I am a truthful woman,

kindly placating my husband.

 

I am a lover of nature,

when I have the time.

 

I am a considerate woman,

temporarily distracted.

 

A slender woman,

temporarily fat.

 

(I am hoping this poem

will end with satisfaction,

a nice round resolution

that makes it all better.)

 

I am a good-hearted woman,

temporarily angry.

 

A strong woman,

temporarily tired.

 

A loving woman,

temporarily alienated.

 

(If only I knew

the unwritten last line

then this poem

wouldn’t be happening.)

 

I am a sexy woman,

temporarily subdued.

 

A competent woman,

temporarily overwhelmed.

 

I have Hope for breakfast,

Denial for lunch,

Failure for dinner.

 

Resolution, I wanted.

As in “final,”

or as in “New Year’s?”

 

Imagine ending a poem:

“Tomorrow I’ll do better.”

 

 

We know the final resolution.

Will my dying words remain:

 

“This is not happening”?

 


From the Fall 1993 issue of Inquiring Mind (Vol. 10, No. 1)
Text © 1993 by Alia Johnson

Author

Sangha member Alia Johnson submitted this poem when she lived in Berkeley, California.

Author

Sangha member Alia Johnson submitted this poem when she lived in Berkeley, California.

 
 
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